Car for Kids America

My story begins when my mom was 15-years-old. She was raped by my father and that is how I was conceived.

Soon after I was born my mom was diagnosed with postpartum depression.

When I was two weeks old I had trouble breathing and my mom found out I had a tumor in my throat. I had to have surgery to remove the tumor and then was sent home to recover. Not too long after I went home somehow when I was in my crib all my stiches in my neck ripped open. I am thankful my grandmother came to check in on my mother and I because when she did my mother was standing there watching me bleed out and not doing anything to stop it.

I believe my mother was so still so angry and resented me because I reminded her of her rape. My grandma ended up picking me up and holding my head to my body and getting me to the hospital in time.

This was my beginning.

When I was about 3-years-old my mom married my stepdad. They had my little sister and then my little brother.

From as early as I can remember my parents highly favored my siblings.

I remember one time we were back to school shopping at the flea market when I saw the coolest pair of high top Vans I had ever seen. They had checkers and so many bright colors. I had never seen shoes like that before. I picked them up and asked my stepdad if I could have them.

He looked me straight in my eyes and said no, yet he turned to my younger sister and said, “Would you like these shoes?”

It broke my heart so much because I could feel him using my excitement for the shoes against me. It was just another way to make me feel like I wasn’t as important as my brother and sister.

Drugs are another issue that plagues family for as long as I can remember. My mom’s pregnancy with my sister did not even stop her or my stepdad from consuming drugs day in and day out.

His drug of choice was heroin and my mother’s was meth.

The majority of my childhood was spent watching my parents do and sell drugs.

My stepdad became very violent and would beat on me and my mother on a regular basis.

I remember one time he threw my mother through our glass French doors. She landed on the back porch and in the process her two front teeth were knocked out. I saw all of this happen right in front of me. After her teeth were knocked out he would make fun of her all the time.

She became very depressed and tried killing herself in our bathroom. She locked the door and broke the mirror. She eventually let me in and I saw my mother bleeding from her wrists in our bathtub. Somehow my grandparents showed up and were able to get her help and she lived.

You might be thinking, ‘Where was Child Protective Services?”.

They were there actually. My family went through seven CPS cases while I was growing up.

It was basically hopeless though because my parents coached us on what to say to the CPS workers. They would threaten us with beatings if we didn’t say exactly what we were supposed to.

My parents also had us pee in their drug test cups so they wouldn’t be caught testing positive for drugs.

One time we were removed from our house and went to go live with my stepdad’s mother. She was mean herself and also resented me for not being her son’s child. Life with her was just about as difficult as life at home.

The violence between my mom and my stepdad came to a head one day when he showed up unexpectedly at our doorstep. He had been in jail and had gotten out and not told anyone.

He kidnapped my mother that day.

I called my grandparents and they came and got us kids and we went looking for them. Somehow, by the grace of God, we found them at an old motel on the Westside. My grandfather and uncle and the hotel manager broke down the door and we found my mother duct tapped to a chair. I remember the duct tape being so tight her skin was budging out. She was sweating and crying, but we couldn’t understand her because her mouth was duct tapped shut.

He was arrested and sent back to jail.

I wanted a better life, but things kept going downhill.

You see, all of this was happening while I was going to school or trying to go to school.

On the days I didn’t have to stay home and take care of my baby brother because my parents wouldn’t wake up, I would try attend school, but I always had to remember to cover up my bruises and be cautious to avoid questions from adults.

One day I ended up getting arrested and spend three weeks in juvenile detention. One day a school a girl who had been picking on me called me a bastard. See I didn’t know what that meant until a friend told me.

I became so angry. This girl knew my mother had been raped. I got into a physical fight with this girl and caused her to need a few stiches. I guess all my anger just came out that day because I had never been in a fight before.

I was later arrested and found guilty and sentenced to three weeks in a juvenile detention center. However, there was a good thing that came from this bad situation.

I told my entire story.

I told her everything, all the stories I just told you plus so many more I don’t have the time to tell today. This helped me get out of my parents’ house for good. This started the process of me being adopted by my grandparents.

In a way I am thankful for that experience because I was finally able to get help.

I went to two high schools before I found San Antonio CAN. I never felt like I fit it. When I was there I would miss my siblings and worry if they were okay. After the kidnapping incident my grandparents decided to legally adopt me.

I remember I was in class one time and shared with the class that I might be able to go to college since I was adopted I could get grants. The adult in the room asked me in front of the whole class, “Why are you being adopted? You/re parents don’t want you?”

It was like a punch in the gut.

Immediately after finding the Can Academies I didn’t feel lonely. For the first time, my teachers understood and helped me. They made me feel wanted. If it weren’t for them I don’t think I would be graduating. I finally found find the first place where I truly belonged.

My advisor Ms. Simmons and my English teacher Ms. Hatfield made me feel like they understood where I had been and that I was wanted.

If it weren’t for San Antonio CAN I don’t think I would be graduating from high school.

Now my life is different.

Although my mom will always be my mom and I can’t change the past, I can choose what I do moving forward.

My goals are to join the Army after high school and eventually earn a degree in education and come back to teach at the CAN. I want to help students like me find their purpose.

And as for me, I was adopted by my grandparents. My grandparents love me very much. I have a boyfriend who helped me get in my journey to get off meth and I found a great church that I consider a second home.

I am thankful for the Can, my grandparents, my boyfriend and my church. I am also thankful for those of you reading this today.

I found find the first place I felt I truly belonged, San Antonio Can.

I know now that I life of love, faith and hope to look forward to. Thank you for believing in me.

Like many students, Roxana had failed the English portion of the STAAR test.

She wasn’t sure how she would succeed, but she was sure her future beyond high school was on hold.

Facing taking the STAAR test again was discouraging, even more so when she could not find the support she needed at school.

“I had difficulties taking the English STAAR test in my old school not because I didn’t pay attention,” she says. Her teacher gave students books to improve their reading; she was simply not asked questions about them. No discussions about them followed.

She was, in other words, left to learn on her own.

“I want to graduate. I don’t want to spend my days like this,” she remembers.

When she found Texans Can Academies, the difference was clear. Her prayers were answered.

In addition to the reading and writing proficiency she was gaining through the interactive readings in every class, Roxana found engaging teachers who went the extra mile.

“They spent time actually working days that they could be resting at their houses, but no: they really care about you. They treat you with love and respect.”

Roxana is excited to meet her future beyond school, but she looks back on her time at Texans Can with gratitude, and she has a word for those like her who cannot see a way forward.

“I want to encourage you. Keep going. You only fail when you fail to try.”

Roxana graduated from Texans Can in 2019.

The halls of Houston Can! Academy are filled with students who were at-risk of not completing their high school education. Nikosha is no different. But what is different is her unwavering determination to take her life in a new direction, despite being dealt a tough life. To meet her you would never think such a warm, friendly and smart young girl has been through so much. An unstable family, financial issues and even the loss of all her clothes and personal items aren’t enough to deter Nikosha’s mission to graduate and go to college. Before Houston Can! Academy, Nikosha found herself unfocused and quickly loosing interest at her previous school. “Before, I was missing so many days of school.” However, at the behest of her friend, she changed her outlook on education Nikosha earned the 2005-2006 Student of the Year award in the Ninth grade center because of her perfect attendance and high academic performance. This was quite an honor for a girl many would agree had every reason to quit school. “Instead of stopping at the hurdles she faced, Nikosha has continued to jump them and be an example to other students,” said Lonnie Dearman, student advisor. “Mr. Dearman was a wonderful counselor to me. I could always depend on him and feel assured that any confidential information I shared with him didn’t go anywhere,” adds Nikosha. While balancing school and studies, Nikosha, the oldest of six, also works part-time to help with family expenses. “It’s important to me to set a good example for my siblings. They look up to me,” adds Nikosha. When asked about her favorite subjects and college plans, Nikosha’s eyes twinkle as she talks about Math, Integrated Physics & Chemistry and her goal to attend Lamar University in Port Arthur. “When the school took us on a visit to Lamar University, I just fell in love with the school and campus. Ever since, I have had my heart set on going there to pursue a degree in Psychiatry.” “I really like to talk to people and help them with their problems.” Statistically speaking, Nikosha should be anywhere but Houston Can!, but thanks to her determination and the staff of Houston Can! Academy, she won’t leave until she achieves her goals.

All my life I have had to overcome problems that I thought would never happen to me. I was born with asthma, and my little brother was born with Downs Syndrome. We are both black males, poor, and grew up in a bad neighborhood; we were born into problems. To top it off, a problem that I am still trying to overcome is the hard fight my mother put up against cancer for ten years leading to her ultimate death. She died on May 17, 2009. It still affects me every day of my life. 

That next year was one of the hardest years of my life. We were poorer than poor, living in Mason Manor trying to make it while my mama worked two jobs. She was then laid off because her employer felt she was supposed to enjoy her last days with her kids. No one could say the words “yo mama” without catching my fist in their teeth. That caused us to do a lot of moving. It seemed every school I went to there was always that one person who would always say it and make me mad. 

By 8th grade my mom thought it would be a good idea to move us to Pflugerville. It was a rough year, but I barely made it through. That summer my mama spent a lot of time in and out the hospital with medical procedures. It was now the first day of school at Pflugerville High. I made it through, went to football practice and ended up fighting with this guy. Luckily, I wasn’t suspended. The next day at school his homeboy approached me and said, “Let me see you do me like that…!” I didn’t say anything. I just started throwing a flurry of punches until he hit the floor. Then the whole football team jumped me in the main hallway. I injured three guys, so they expelled me and from the school district. The school called my mother out of bed to come get me. This only frazzled her more. 

I had to learn to control myself a little more. We ended up moving to some apartments. I transferred to another high school. The first year and a half there went alright, aside from the fact I was still slowly losing my mother. It was starting to be clearer that she would not be around for as long as I had thought. But I was going to school and taking care of business, the most important thing. Soon enough, the second semester of my sophomore year I was kicked out of high school for being an alleged gang member. 

That brought me to Austin Can! for a little while. It helped me out at the time by attending the PM session. In the morning I would take care of my mom, go to school from 12 to 4 and go straight back home to take care of her some more. That gave us alot of time to make memories. I finished the school year at Austin Can! with no problem. The following school year I decided to go back to my home high school, worst idea of my life. One day I had noone to call because I had just checked my mom into Seton hospital for her chemotherapy. That was the day I was expelled from AISD for gang relation and failure to ID. 

For two weeks I was out of school and in the hospital with my mother, watching her fade away slowly. Soon after she was shipped to San Antonio to a hospital specializing in cancer. She died in that hospital May 17, 2009. I made a promise to my mother that I would graduate and attend college so I could be rich and take care of her. I graduated from Austin Can! this past spring and kept my promise to my Mom, now I have to work on the second half of the promise.

When Eddie grew up with his mother, brother, and sister, a regular family meal was a tortilla with salt for seasoning.

His loving mother worked hard, but making ends meet was almost beyond her. His dad was not in the picture.

One day, Eddie came home from school to find his brother and sister hungry. He couldn’t take the sight of it any longer. “I decided that was enough. Something had to change.”

At fifteen, Eddie left the ninth grade to go to work.

Moving away from his mother and siblings in Arkansas, Eddie began living with his uncle, who had a construction job for him in San Antonio. There, Eddie had no friends. His absence from home was painful. The burden was lightened, however, by knowing that he made enough money to provide food and necessities for his brother and sister.

After some time, a co-worker many years older told Eddie that he saw something in him. “You know, you’re really good at this. But you could be doing much more. Why don’t you go to school? Why aren’t you in school?”

For Eddie, who left that path years before, the thought of graduating high school at twenty-one was far from appealing. But, his co-worker’s words worked on his imagination. He looked online and found Texans Can - San Antonio.

This was, Eddie says, “the best decision I ever made.”

At Texans Can - San Antonio, Eddie found staff and teachers who made him feel cared for—the first time he ever knew that feeling in school. He made friends. And he still worked construction, still sending money back home, while working for his high school diploma.

One day, one of Eddie’s friends, a fellow member on the basketball team, was struck by a car and died. Devastated by the loss, Eddie turned to the abundantly available emotional support from the staff at Texans Can. Through this time, Eddie connected with his math tutor, who became a mentor and friend. Eddie began to enjoy weekends.

“For the first time in my life, I actually got to be a kid.” His heavy responsibilities, he said, faded in those moments.

The impact Eddie’s mentor made on him stays with him to this day. Now, seven years after graduation, Eddie is an award-winning store manager for AT&T, a company he has stayed with since he graduated. He has traveled abroad, and he has purchased his second home. Because of his experiences at Texans Can - San Antonio and the success he has known since, he wants to give back, being a mentor to young men who, like him, have had to go without the love and guidance of a father.

Most important to Eddie is his family. Married with two small children, a six-year-old son and three-year-old daughter, Eddie is grateful that they “will never know what it was like to struggle” as he did. “They will never know the pain of growing up without their father.”

And Eddie is a father figure to more than his children. Thanks to his hard work, his brother and sister were provided for. Both graduated and now, says Eddie, are “doing well,” and they now live in the same Arkansas community. If cousins need equipment so they can enjoy playing on the basketball team, Eddie is ready to provide. The beat of his heart is to be the father he never knew, and the one he found at Texans Can - San Antonio.

The new life he has found through Texans Can, Eddie says, is “truly amazing.”